Post Falls Outlet – Go Oriental Products Lady!
December 13, 2010
My wife suggested I go down to the Post Falls Outlet because the Van Heusen store was closing up. Along with Bass, these were two of the last stores in this outlet, which is all but empty, making it more post-apocalyptic than Post Falls -vast stretches of empty buildings and huge parking lots.
There are, as far as I could tell, only two stores left: a kitchen place, and this Asian Goods store. After finding a good shirt to buy off the all but empty racks, I stopped in to see if it had any good tea.
The back of the store was dark, and the front window had a tv in it that was picking up the last bits of the analog frequency of some Spokane station through the fuzz. The lady there was talking to a couple who had been attracted there like me, only to be caught by the proprieter in a long one sided conversation – the BS headlock – as one of my friends aptly named it. After they escaped, it was my turn, and since I didn’t have anywhere to go, I allowed myself to get pulled into a conversation with this very interesting but clearly bored woman with broken English.
She had escaped Vietnam during the war with a GI who married her and brought her back to Idaho, where they live up in the country. She said she was around 70, but looked a bit younger (and her illustration of being able to kick my head off was also something I wouldn’t expect an elderly lady to be able to do) but I would believe that her healthy ways had preserved her youth.
So, when the Illuminati UN does take over the world, the US falls and Idaho is left to defend itself against Satan and the Communists, I am sure this lady will still be there, off the first Post Falls exit, selling tasty Jasmine tea and Asian kitsch in the ruins. I do believe she teaches martial arts, so maybe we will be living in the abandoned Van Heusen store next door.
